"Xander," Giles called from the kitchen, where he was preparing a tray of
snacks. "Willow's on the phone."

Xander plopped onto the couch and glanced at the clock. 8:38. "I don't
want to talk to her," he called back. "She just wants to try to spoil me.
I'm too smart to fall for her evil tricks."

"He says he doesn't want to talk to you," Giles said into the phone,
unwrapping a Ho-Ho and placing it on the tray with the other assorted
Twinkies, cupcakes, and Ring-Dings. "Something about spoiling him and your
evil tricks. It didn't make much sense."

Willow giggled at the other end. "Oh well," she said in mock sorrow.
"Tell him if he changes his mind, he's got 20 minutes to call me and find
out what Skinner knows about SpenderÖ and anything else he wants to know.
But I'm watching "That 70's Show" so he can only call during commercial
breaks."

"All right, I'll tell him," Giles agreed and hung up the phone. He picked
up the tray and walked into the living room, relaying Willow's message to
Xander. Setting the tray of sweets on the coffee table in front of the
sofa, Giles sat down next to Xander and smiled when the boy rested his head
on his shoulder.

"It's still 17 minutes," Xander whined and Giles checked the clock, seeing
that it was indeed 8:43 pm.

Laughing, Giles said, "Well, you can always call Willow if you want to know
what happens."

"No," Xander said resolutely. "I'm strong. We can just watch 'That 70's
Show' while we wait," he added, reaching for the remote. He turned the
television on, then sat back and sighed happily as Giles wrapped one arm
around his shoulders. Resting his head once again on the older man's
shoulder, he began watching the show.

The two watched in silence, Xander finding it more amusing than Giles did.
"You gave that team of midgets an ass-whoopin'!" he exclaimed, repeating
one of Eric's lines. "God, this show's funny!"

"Ah, yes," Giles agreed, shaking his head in confusion.

Finally the show ended and the two sat through the seemingly infinite
commercial break leading up to the beginning of "The X-Files". And then it
began. "Previously on 'The X-Files'," the announcer said as images
appeared on the screen.

"Previously on 'The X-Files', five seasons happened," Xander echoed,
watching the network attempt to cram everything that had happened
previously into the short timeframe. "Well, I sure hope people actually
watched it or they're gonna be completely lost."

"Xander?" Giles said affectionately. When the boy turned to look at him,
he added, "Shut up and watch the show."

The two watched in silence as the episode's teaser played. "Dead people
already! Yay!" Xander said happily at the first commercial break, turning
to smile at Giles. "And that Cassandra woman's got green blood! What's up
with that?"

Giles laughed. "Maybe you should just wait and watch the rest of the show."

They continued watching in happy silence, occasionally grabbing something
to eat until the next commercial break. "And now MORE people dead! But
that last guy just deserved it. I mean, come ON. Couldn't he have at
least TRIED to save himself?"

"Yeah, you're right," Giles agreed. "What's the point of knowing he's an
alien if you still wind up dead, man?" he asked the television even though
the man was no longer on the screen.

"Exactly!" Xander exclaimed in agreement.

As the show restarted, they quieted and watched in silence. But then
Krycek appeared on the screen. Both men sat forward slightly and Xander
exclaimed, "Krycek!" and then quieted with a sidelong glance at Giles.

"God, he's hot," they said in unison and began laughing.

When the show cut to Mulder and Scully again, they saw that the pair was
sneaking into the X-Files office. Mulder looked up information on the
computer and then the big revelation was found. "CSM's picture is in the
computer?" Xander yelled in disbelief. "What kind of morons wouldn't have
found this by now? Okay, Mulder and Scully are NOT that stupid!" They
continued watching as Skinner came in to warn the two that people were on
their way down to the office.

"Damned little weasel," Giles muttered angrily after Spender caught them
and threatened to report Mulder and Scully.

"Spender's a ferret," Xander corrected.

"Oh, whatever," Giles muttered.

They waited impatiently for the commercials to end and then watched the
not-so-touching father-son scene between the Cigarette Smoking Man and
Spender. "Whoa," Xander exclaimed, watching the scene. "CSM just
bitchslapped his kid."

"Xander, that isn't really a very nice term," Giles began.

" 'You pale to Fox Mulder'. Why can't you be more like your brother Fox,
Jeffy?" Xander mocked the character on the screen, interrupting his lover.
"Man, Jeffy's dad isn't very nice."

"Why the hell is Mulder playing basketball while Scully does all the damn
work?" Giles asked angrily as the show cut back to the pair.

Xander laughed at the older man getting wrapped up in the show. "Because
he's a giant punk," Xander explained patiently. "We just have to deal with
that."

They watched in silence for a few moments as Spender arrived at the door of
the man his father had told him to kill. "20 bucks says Jeffy can't kill
the guy," Xander predicted.

"Of course he can't kill him," Giles agreed and the two watched as their
predictions were validated.

"Go Krycek!" Xander called, watching him stab the alien in the back of the
head. "Okay, there's Krycek. And there's Spender. Dammit! It's the
WRONG brother! Don't you people ever listen?" Xander shouted at the
screen, causing Giles to laugh beside him.

"So, now Spender and Krycek shag next to the dead alien, right?" Giles asked.

"Yes," Xander agreed. "But it's SUPPOSED to be Mulder, not Spender."

They watched the commercials and the scene with Mulder and Scully
impatiently because, well, Krycek was in this episode. "Ahh, Jeffy?" Giles
asked the television as Krycek explained the situation to Spender, adopting
Xander's name for the character. "Your father's not a nice guy. You
haven't figured this out yet?"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," Xander said impatiently as the Cigarette Smoking Man
continued his seeming monologue. When the camera cut to show Agent
Fowley's face, his eyes widened. "That BITCH!" he and Giles exclaimed
simultaneously.

Then they quieted as Skinner and Spender attempted to locate Cassandra, who
was missing from her hospital bed. She showed up at Mulder's apartment and
begged him to shoot her. "Don't do it, Mulder," Giles told the screen.
"She has that green toxic blood, right? If you shoot her, it's not going
to be good for you or Scully." As the camera closed in on the gun, the two
men sat forward just a bit more, anticipating what came next. As the words
"To Be Continued" replaced it on the screen, Giles swore, "Dammit! What
kind of way is that to end it?"

"The 'X-Files' way," Xander informed him. "At least we only have to wait a
week for this one. What if it was a season finale?"

Giles laughed as the telephone rang shrilly. "It's Willow," he said after
answering it.

Xander took the phone from Giles' hand and held it to his ear. "Yes, we
watched it Willow," he said. "Yeah, it was good. Yeah, she was a bitch.
Yeah, he looked hot. Yeah, I thought that was funny, too," he continued,
settling back into Giles' arms and smiling.

The End